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Post Info TOPIC: The Vampire Rules

Immortally Beloved

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The Vampire Rules
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1. Vampires are intuitive,
not mind-readers.

2. Wear Turtlenecks if you do not want to be stared at like a buffet.

3. Do Not Use my travel cup.

4. Poker night is sacrosanct - live with it, the undead do.

5. Temporary staking is blackmail. Play fair.

6. Don't joke about being "turned", humorous hints do not work! Strong hints do not work. If you desire to be turned speak directly to your Vampire.

7. Do not be disturbed if your Vampire doesn't grant your "turning" wish. Turning is forever, if it doesn't work out, you will not be a Puppy we can drop at the ASPCA if we do not like your "forever" personality.

8. "The Tarpit"
is a perfectly good answer for questions with a negative result.

9. Ask me for help ONLY when you want a definite, final solution. Anything else is a waste of my time. Sympathy is what your humans are for.

10. Anything you say will be remembered for at least 10-20 years.
Choose your words wisely.

11. Whenever possible, do not knock on the freezer door before sunset or after sunrise-unless the building is on fire.

12. If it smells tasty, we may bite. It's what we do.

Written by RedNightBird

-- Edited by Nancy on Monday 19th of April 2010 12:01:52 PM


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